I came here to tell you a little story. Well, actually just a little snippet of one of may stories, some of which remain to be written. But, this is my personal testimony and "Twas Grace..." story. You guys please click the reply link to tell your own "Twas Grace..." stories. Let's start an un-stoppable wave of God's Grace!!!
In June of 2002 my wife of nine incredible years was taken from me suddenly from a massive Brain Anurysm which ended her life and mine very abruptly and without notice. This single event would change my life forever and very nearly ended it literally.
Because of it, I spent the follow several years angry and full of hatred towards God whom I blamed for the death of my wife. I couldn't understand, or perhaps didn't want to understand how God could cause me such pain and still say He loved me. I cursed His name nearly every day, often standing, kneeling, or lying on my wife's grave. The pain that I felt was so deep and so all-encompassing that my world was very quickly blanketed in darkness from which I saw no escape.
I began drinking very heavily, and looking for comfort in bars and night-clubs... often seeking out other women to substitute for my wife for awhile. But, inevitably my world was still a very dark place to wake up to when the booze wore off. I got caught up in the world's system for coping... "Seek out and destroy your pain with whatever you can find to numb it!". But to God, I directed all my hatred and my anger! I wanted nothing more to do with Him as long as I lived!
As it turned out, that was exactly the way it could have ended up. You see, I had become so enveloped in darkness that I found myself at the very verge of suicide one night. A razor blade, the chosen instrument to end my pain. Had it not been for the sound of my children playing down the hall at that moment, that night would have been my last in this world!
Then, still lost in despair, still flailing around trying to find some peace... ANY PEACE! I found myself contemplating my life and crying on a bench in the middle of a city park in the middle of a thunderstorm. I fell to my knees and again screamed out to God. But this time my cries were cries of surrender! No longer the defiant, arrogant, and angry man I had been... I was now completely broken and crying out to God that I had enough of trying to do this on my own! My life was over unless He wanted it and could do something with it! I screamed at Him at the top of my lungs to take my life... ALL OF IT!
Guess what? He Did! Almost that very instant, I was changed from the inside out! The darkness that had covered me seemed to be washed away by light and a very warm feeling from deep within me that swept over me like nothing I'd ever known before. I immediately stopped drinking, no longer cursed (at least without feeling horrible if I did!), and my heart was changed from one of anger, hatred, and utter despair to one of Love. Yes... Love! God instilled in me that day a Love for all people that I to this day cannot explain. If you see me in public somewhere sometime.... know that I Love You! Not with my love mind you... but with the Love of God that He gave to me that day! My love is worthless, but His.... Oh.... His LOVE.... is PRICELESS!
You see... that's the whole point of this ministry. That's the whole point of my very life! To share with you the Love of God that He so freely gave to me and showers on you whether you accept it or not. Wherever you are, wherever you've been, whatever you've done, and whatever you're going through... I Love You, and more importantly than anything else in the universe... GOD LOVES YOU!
I've already told you through this story how I came to receive God's Grace, Mercy, and Love in my life. My prayer is that if you don't already have this relationship with God that you won't wait until your life has grown so dark that you can longer see any light the way I did before you do the same. And if you do already enjoy this relationship with God; grow in it, appreciating Him more, loving Him more, being all that He made you to be and receiving His many out-pourings of Love in the process.
May the Endless Love and Amazing Grave of God abide in you always - Bryan